My life journey was challenging as I grew up among bullies. Worse, I was gifted as green-eyed and left-handed, and according to research, my type differs from the masses. The good and bad summary is that we tend to be more creative but are misunderstood by others to endure endless name-calling and not being accepted socially.

Digital Version

Looking back, I realize the alone time was my gift in disguise. Instead of accepting the bullying, I spent my time alone talking to my reflection in the mirror, weighing the pros and cons of questionable commentary. Gradually, I began to watch my facial expressions and gestures, too.

I owe my business success to the unforeseen training my father offered at the dinner table. Every evening, he shared a story about an athlete who overcame a challenge to help the team win a game. The theme is, ‘Never give up, but find a better way!’ It was all perfect training for my forthcoming entrepreneurial and sales career.

The good news for me is that I was ahead of my time. I was expected to attend college to find an eligible husband, but that wasn’t my intent. Moreover, if I pursued a career, the only possibilities were to be a teacher or a secretary, both of which I refused. Weeks before graduating from UCLA, I asked a friend if she would like to start a business together; she suggested a party-giving business. We had no prior knowledge but the courage to attempt it.

Details Details was the name of our company. Given we stood out for our generation, much media attention was ours, including being featured in the L.A. Times social section and on the cover of Mademoiselle Magazine. Remarkably, our first client was KFWB, the premiere Rock ‘n Roll Station in Los Angeles. The party was held at Universal Studios and proved a huge success. However, shortly afterward, the financial market dramatically fell, and KFWB became a news station, so we needed to seek work.

A few years later, I found my lifetime partner, and we take pride in our family. Moving to Silicon Valley before it was known or even validated taught us many life lessons as we all began to mature. I was enjoying another entrepreneurship but realized a job was necessary to pay for college for our children. My husband came home one evening to say unbelievable words while I was sitting with my back to him; ‘I know what you should do; you have the personality of a salesperson!’ Horrified, I asked if that was a compliment or an insult! The rest is history.

Corporate Discrimination

One of the better sales techniques is to repeat another person’s words to gain clarity. Using this technique with the first Sales Director earned me the job—one I did not want. Why? I was to sell an unknown brand of copier door-to-door against the Xerox brand. Worse, it was almost an hour’s drive to work and arrive at 8:00 a.m.

Discrimination against me abounded on every level, including refusal to train me because I was just another stupid woman who would fail. Privately, I smiled because it allowed me to do things my way. I made friends with every contact, no matter their status. The short story is that I became the top producer by the fourth month, not knowing anything about the unknown copier. Why? I was referred to as a breath of fresh air. I shared stories with each person and inquired how they chose their job. Laughter soon became ours, and my title was ‘a breath of fresh air!’

The games got uglier at corporate. At year-end, my thank you was to have the accounts given to the men, and my quota tripled for the following year, requiring me to seek new work. The same repeated itself over 11 years. And I soon learned that 100% commission was the way to go instead of an unacceptable salary. One Manager complained to my face that I was earning more money than him.

Eleven years and eleven jobs prompted me to finally take one day off for myself. I stopped at a red light, but the person behind me talking to her children in the rear seat was unaware. Her car slammed full force into mine. I could feel my brain swaying inside my head. No doctor wanted to touch me, and I was in pain for ten years.

Thankfully, I was a passenger in a car on a rainy night when the car slowly skidded into a lamppost. I timidly said, ‘You better call an ambulance.’ Finally, I would get the help I needed was my hope.

Near-Death Changed My Life!

I was placed on a gurney, awaiting admission to the hospital, to have my entire life change for the better. A stunning gold light encased my whole body. Next, a vision appeared before me indicating I was to become a speaker, to which I fervently replied, ‘Yes, that’s what I always wanted to do!’ A blink of a gold light above let me know my speaking would occur.

The first vision faded to bring up the next, my life report card. On the left-hand side, I had high marks, but the right-hand side was an embarrassment. It was entitled Community Service and was entirely blank. Immediately, I pledged to begin giving back to communities however possible. But being the salesperson, I mentally said, ‘To give my best, I need to be able to walk out of the hospital on my own.’ A second sudden blink of a gold light above assured me I would recover. Immediately after my experience, my family came over in tears. I assured them I would recover and suggested they get a good night’s sleep!

The Experiment

Placed in the ICU, more unusual moments occurred. A brain surgeon ‘who happened to be in the area’ heard about my case and asked to do an experiment, to which I agreed. Typically, a metal halo is hammered into one’s forehead with a 5-pound weight attached, but nothing changed. The experiment was to attach a 60-pound weight that instantly changed how I felt for the better.

Surgery

Heavily medicated, I had two minutes to meet the surgeon. Upon hearing, ‘Mrs. Stutz, when you awake, you will most likely be paralyzed.’ His words let me know he didn’t expect me to survive, but given what occurred the night before, I shot back, ‘Doctor, when I awake, I fully expect to be well!’ He jumped backward before cutting me open. ;) Afterward, the entire staff on duty visited my room, referring to me as ‘the Walking Miracle.’

‘Our worst experiences are our gifts in disguise.’

Entrepreneurship Revisited

Upon healing, I created Smooth Sale, which refers to earning a returning and referring clientele. It was a sales training company for sales teams and entrepreneurs and was successful from the start. But we soon moved to a new city where I was not welcome as a trainer because a female couldn’t know enough about sales. I was ridiculed on stage for making the ridiculous announcement. Someone took me aside to say, ‘To establish credibility, you must write a book!’ My phone wasn’t ringing, and I had nothing to lose.

My ‘Corporate Tell-All,’ with names changed to protect the guilty, broke many records. The first publishing house agreed to it; the book quickly became an International Bestseller, appeared in TIME Magazine, I was on ABC-TV news with Christian Spencer, and over time, became Evergreen – among the classics! The title is Nice Girls DO Get the Sale: Relationship Building That Gets Results.

Due to the need to interview for a job every year, I became a pro at attaining the job. I later wrote HIRED! How to Use Sales Techniques to Sell Yourself on Interviews. The book helped many secure the jobs they desired.

Change of Mindset

Upon accepting an invitation from a marketing guru to join her group and learn about social media as it emerged, I was stopped in my tracks. She proclaimed that I was too competitive and needed to alter my behavior to become collaborative. I kid you not; given my corporate experience, it was the scariest concept I had ever considered seriously. But it works well, never to look back.

Moving Inspires A New Direction

We moved across the country to be with our growing family. Invited to business events, people took one look at an ‘older female’ to turn their backs on me. It was hardly worth the price to endure the nastiness. Thankfully, a gentleman announced the concept of blogging, which I realized could be my gift in disguise. Better yet, I positioned it as my gift to the readership as part of my community service effort.

Community Service

I slowly began blogging to test the strategy. I shared my sales and business development knowledge with the readership to help them advance their endeavors. It didn’t take too long to realize, that the urging of daily publishing of content was not possible for me alone. I began asking leaders in varying fields to contribute their knowledge, and together, we continue to grow a sizable audience. The acclaims make the effort well-worthwhile.

Global Perspective

I continue to meet incredible people globally online, which complements everything I do. To summarize my life, as a teen who did not fit in with local society, I chose international travel at age 16 to be a summer student in Guadalajara, Mexico. I never stopped traveling, and today, I have visited at least 50 countries.

Due to the discriminatory practices at corporate and elsewhere, plus the traveling experience, I advocate for inclusion and equity. We can achieve so much more when we are willing to drop assumptions to reach out and learn from one another. It was a treat to meet similar-minded people online, and to this day, we support one another toward the effort for a fairer and just tomorrow.

For people facing disparaging remarks and discrimination, I encourage them to dawn their well-oiled Super-Person cape to fly above the noise and have the darts thrown at their backs slide to the ground. ‘Believe you can, and you will!’

In Summary

My near-death experience was the gift of a lifetime. Today, I encourage others to live without regret by living their desired lives. Statistics are made to be broken. With that in mind, we must accept that not everything works out on the first attempt, but trial and error are the best teachers. ‘Purpose, Passion, and Perseverance’ are critical elements for success.

Know that Anything is possible with the right mindset. My near-death experience prompts my motto, ‘Believe, Become, Empower.’ Believe you can do it, become that person, and empower others to do similarly.