Success Is Our Unique Journey to Be Handled with Care
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My life journey was challenging as I grew up among bullies. Worse, I was gifted as green-eyed and left-handed, and according to research, my type differs from the masses. The good and bad summary is that we tend to be more creative but are misunderstood by others to endure endless name-calling and not being accepted socially.
Looking back, I realize the alone time was my
gift in disguise. Instead of accepting the bullying, I spent my time alone
talking to my reflection in the mirror, weighing the pros and cons of
questionable commentary. Gradually, I began to watch my facial expressions and
gestures, too.
I owe my business success to the unforeseen
training my father offered at the dinner table. Every evening, he shared a
story about an athlete who overcame a challenge to help the team win a game.
The theme is, ‘Never give up, but find a better way!’ It was all perfect
training for my forthcoming entrepreneurial and sales career.
The good news for me is that I was ahead of my
time. I was expected to attend college to find an eligible husband, but that
wasn’t my intent. Moreover, if I pursued a career, the only possibilities were
to be a teacher or a secretary, both of which I refused. Weeks before graduating
from UCLA, I asked a friend if she would like to start a business together; she
suggested a party-giving business. We had no prior knowledge but the courage to
attempt it.
Details Details was the
name of our company. Given we stood out for our generation, much media
attention was ours, including being featured in the L.A. Times social section
and on the cover of Mademoiselle Magazine. Remarkably, our first client was
KFWB, the premiere Rock ‘n Roll Station in Los Angeles. The party was held at
Universal Studios and proved a huge success. However, shortly afterward, the
financial market dramatically fell, and KFWB became a news station, so we
needed to seek work.
A few years later, I found my lifetime partner,
and we take pride in our family. Moving to Silicon Valley before it was known
or even validated taught us many life lessons as we all began to mature. I was
enjoying another entrepreneurship but realized a job was necessary to pay for
college for our children. My husband came home one evening to say unbelievable
words while I was sitting with my back to him; ‘I know what you should do; you
have the personality of a salesperson!’ Horrified, I asked if that was a
compliment or an insult! The rest is history.
Corporate Discrimination
One of the better sales techniques is to repeat
another person’s words to gain clarity. Using this technique with the first
Sales Director earned me the job—one I did not want. Why? I was to sell an
unknown brand of copier door-to-door against the Xerox brand. Worse, it was
almost an hour’s drive to work and arrive at 8:00 a.m.
Discrimination against me abounded on every
level, including refusal to train me because I was just another stupid woman
who would fail. Privately, I smiled because it allowed me to do things my way.
I made friends with every contact, no matter their status. The short story is
that I became the top producer by the fourth month, not knowing anything about
the unknown copier. Why? I was referred to as a breath of fresh air. I shared
stories with each person and inquired how they chose their job. Laughter soon
became ours, and my title was ‘a breath of fresh air!’
The games got uglier at corporate. At year-end,
my thank you was to have the accounts given to the men, and my quota tripled
for the following year, requiring me to seek new work. The same repeated itself
over 11 years. And I soon learned that 100% commission was the way to go
instead of an unacceptable salary. One Manager complained to my face that I was
earning more money than him.
Eleven years and eleven jobs prompted me to
finally take one day off for myself. I stopped at a red light, but the person
behind me talking to her children in the rear seat was unaware. Her car slammed
full force into mine. I could feel my brain swaying inside my head. No doctor
wanted to touch me, and I was in pain for ten years.
Thankfully, I was a passenger in a car on a
rainy night when the car slowly skidded into a lamppost. I timidly said, ‘You
better call an ambulance.’ Finally, I would get the help I needed was my hope.
Near-Death Changed My Life!
I was placed on a gurney, awaiting admission to
the hospital, to have my entire life change for the better. A stunning gold
light encased my whole body. Next, a vision appeared before me indicating I was
to become a speaker, to which I fervently replied, ‘Yes, that’s what I always
wanted to do!’ A blink of a gold light above let me know my speaking would
occur.
The first vision faded to bring up the next, my
life report card. On the left-hand side, I had high marks, but the right-hand
side was an embarrassment. It was entitled Community Service and was entirely
blank. Immediately, I pledged to begin giving back to communities however
possible. But being the salesperson, I mentally said, ‘To give my best, I need
to be able to walk out of the hospital on my own.’ A second sudden blink of a
gold light above assured me I would recover. Immediately after my experience,
my family came over in tears. I assured them I would recover and suggested they
get a good night’s sleep!
The Experiment
Placed in the ICU, more unusual moments
occurred. A brain surgeon ‘who happened to be in the area’ heard about my case
and asked to do an experiment, to which I agreed. Typically, a metal halo is
hammered into one’s forehead with a 5-pound weight attached, but nothing
changed. The experiment was to attach a 60-pound weight that instantly changed
how I felt for the better.
Surgery
Heavily medicated, I had two minutes to meet
the surgeon. Upon hearing, ‘Mrs. Stutz, when you awake, you will most likely be
paralyzed.’ His words let me know he didn’t expect me to survive, but given
what occurred the night before, I shot back, ‘Doctor, when I awake, I fully
expect to be well!’ He jumped backward before cutting me open. ;) Afterward,
the entire staff on duty visited my room, referring to me as ‘the Walking
Miracle.’
‘Our worst experiences are our gifts in
disguise.’
Entrepreneurship Revisited
Upon healing, I created Smooth Sale, which
refers to earning a returning and referring clientele. It was a sales training
company for sales teams and entrepreneurs and was successful from the start.
But we soon moved to a new city where I was not welcome as a trainer because a
female couldn’t know enough about sales. I was ridiculed on stage for making
the ridiculous announcement. Someone took me aside to say, ‘To establish
credibility, you must write a book!’ My phone wasn’t ringing, and I had nothing
to lose.
My ‘Corporate Tell-All,’ with names changed to
protect the guilty, broke many records. The first publishing house agreed to
it; the book quickly became an International Bestseller, appeared in TIME
Magazine, I was on ABC-TV news with Christian Spencer, and over time, became
Evergreen – among the classics! The title is Nice Girls DO Get the Sale:
Relationship Building That Gets Results.
Due to the need to interview for a job every
year, I became a pro at attaining the job. I later wrote HIRED! How to Use
Sales Techniques to Sell Yourself on Interviews. The book helped many secure
the jobs they desired.
Change of Mindset
Upon accepting an invitation from a marketing
guru to join her group and learn about social media as it emerged, I was
stopped in my tracks. She proclaimed that I was too competitive and needed to
alter my behavior to become collaborative. I kid you not; given my corporate
experience, it was the scariest concept I had ever considered seriously. But it
works well, never to look back.
Moving Inspires A New Direction
We moved across the country to be with our
growing family. Invited to business events, people took one look at an ‘older
female’ to turn their backs on me. It was hardly worth the price to endure the nastiness.
Thankfully, a gentleman announced the concept of blogging, which I realized
could be my gift in disguise. Better yet, I positioned it as my gift to the
readership as part of my community service effort.
Community Service
I slowly began blogging to test the strategy. I
shared my sales and business development knowledge with the readership to help
them advance their endeavors. It didn’t take too long to realize, that the
urging of daily publishing of content was not possible for me alone. I began asking
leaders in varying fields to contribute their knowledge, and together, we
continue to grow a sizable audience. The acclaims make the effort
well-worthwhile.
Global Perspective
I continue to meet incredible people globally
online, which complements everything I do. To summarize my life, as a teen who
did not fit in with local society, I chose international travel at age 16 to be
a summer student in Guadalajara, Mexico. I never stopped traveling, and today,
I have visited at least 50 countries.
Due to the discriminatory practices at
corporate and elsewhere, plus the traveling experience, I advocate for
inclusion and equity. We can achieve so much more when we are willing to drop
assumptions to reach out and learn from one another. It was a treat to meet
similar-minded people online, and to this day, we support one another toward
the effort for a fairer and just tomorrow.
For people facing disparaging remarks and
discrimination, I encourage them to dawn their well-oiled Super-Person cape to
fly above the noise and have the darts thrown at their backs slide to the
ground. ‘Believe you can, and you will!’
In Summary
My near-death experience was the gift of a
lifetime. Today, I encourage others to live without regret by living their
desired lives. Statistics are made to be broken. With that in mind, we must
accept that not everything works out on the first attempt, but trial and error
are the best teachers. ‘Purpose, Passion, and Perseverance’ are critical
elements for success.
Know that Anything is possible with the right
mindset. My near-death experience prompts my motto, ‘Believe, Become, Empower.’
Believe you can do it, become that person, and empower others to do similarly.